Tuesday, December 18, 2018

Hong Kong 100k


100 kilometers and 20,000 feet of climbing up and then back down again. Sounds miserable. But, it’s in Hong Kong! And you get a free entry! Right. So, I ran up and down the mountains in Chiang Mai a lot, and then flew to Hong Kong. 

“I’m gonna come to Hong Kong for your race.” I thought my friend Tim, who lives in Wyoming, was joking, but he wasn’t. So, when I got in on Friday morning, there he was. I love seeing new places, and Tim and I get along really well, so it was really nice time together. We saw quite a lot, while also leaving plenty to go back and see “next time.” I appreciate Tim so much for coming out and helping with the race, but it was also just great to hang.


I started the race slowly and from the beginning I felt really good. I enjoyed the first 4 or 5 miles and once the crowd thinned out a little bit I decided to start working. I hit a low point around mile 29, but it only lasted for a mile or two. It was brought on by direct sunlight and having to use my hands (and knees) to get up one hill. Besides that everything worked like clockwork. Tim met me at 5 aid stations and gave me my tailwind and whatever else had my fancy at that time. 

The course was mostly either up or down. Not much flat. If it was going up, we were climbing up stairs made out of stones placed there by design (not God’s). If it was going down, we were descending stairs likewise made of uneven, not always steady, stone. I had practiced some on stairs, but not enough. The technique of stair climbing/descending is different than just running up or down a hill. The beating that the stairs hand your body is more dramatic than regular dirt trail. And, the concentration it takes to navigate the best path up or down a set of uneven stairs accumulates over time.


Besides the one blip I told you about earlier, I felt strong and smooth all the way until mile 48. I saw Tim at that aid station and told him I wasn’t feeling so hot. He used some psychologist’s trick and I left feeling buoyed. A couple miles later was when I saw a porcupine. Hong Kong has wild porcupines. Seriously. And they’re huge.


As mile 55 rolled around, my body, and my brain, decided they had done enough. And I stopped running. There isn’t a good way to explain this “Blowing up” other than to say – I just couldn’t. I tried every trick in the book. But my legs were beat up and my brain was tired. So, I ran a little, really really slowly, but mostly I just walked it in. “Keep moving forward…” I had hit nearly all of my time goals up to that last section. Then, I didn’t.


 I finished in 32nd out of 465 finishers (622 starters) and in 16 hours and 15 minutes. This one will go in the books as the hardest course I’ve ever ran. I’ve done a lot of these races now and everyone is new and presents new challenges. This race was all about managing the stairs. I was happy with the finish. I was super impressed by the Hong Kong runners. And I was so grateful for Tim’s support and accompaniment.

I don’t think I walked away with any big life lessons. But, as with every race, it was hard, and it’s always nice knowing that you can do hard things.


Thank you for all of you that followed along throughout the day. We were required to carry a phone, so while I didn’t see most of your messages, I did feel the notification buzz, and that was always encouraging.

Friday, October 5, 2018

Heading Home


It’s been a good summer. A lot has happened. It’s been busy with work, studying, visiting people, and overall just enjoying being in Ohio. Ohio is such a great place to call home. I am proud to do so, and will probably always feel like it’s home.

But, now, it’s time to head home.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

That doesn’t quite make sense - the having two homes thing. But, it’s my life now - one of the job descriptions of being a missionary.

That seems strange too. The missionary part.

Life has a way of sneaking up and not being anything that you can quite put your hands on.
So, we lean into it, we fight against it, and if we’re lucky, we take naps so we can do it all over again.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I’ve started packing.

I’m headed back to Thailand to resume my work as a counselor to missionaries. I’ll be doing most of the same things as I was when I was there previously - doing my best to provide hope and healing for missionaries, and their children, in Southeast Asia.

The last time that I packed for Thailand, I did so without ever having been to Thailand. I didn’t really know anyone there, and I only had guesses as to what my work would look like. I was so excited about all of the possibilities.

This time, as I’m packing, I’m doing so having spent the better part of a year in Thailand, I know a lot of great people, and I have a pretty good idea of what the job will look like.
And, I’m more excited this time around.

Several people have asked me, “When did you know that you wanted to go back?” I have a vivid memory. There was a day, in a staff meeting where a particular item was being discussed, that I felt needed. And I felt wanted. I hope that doesn’t sound arrogant. It just felt like I was in the right place, and those around me felt the same way. That’s when I knew that I wanted to be in Thailand, in Chiang Mai, and at Cornerstone.

So, here we go!


P.S. All of the counselors at Cornerstone, myself included, raise their own financial support. I am still looking for some friends who would be interested in helping me to finish off raising my support. If you are interested in coming alongside of me and my work you can follow this link to do so: https://paraclete.net/people/paraclete-associates/david-emch/


Sunday, July 1, 2018

Everything



Everything, it seems,
is like every other beautiful thing.
Though there are some mysteries
unlike any other mystery.
And in each one of these
individual beauties
Your essence is the common
element - making each one
both unique and akin.


Running is like life, and life is like a box of chocolates. Missing home is like missing being gone, and missing you is like a forgotten simile. So often we can only describe things by using other things as a point of reference. 


Sunday, June 24, 2018

Heart - too big


Oh my heart, my heart
It’s too big
For its still drawn to shiny things
and deep eyes.
Distracted by the temporary
and the partial.
Clinging to the hopes stored
in jars made by other men
Cut away that extra
So I can love
You.


The Lord your God will circumcise your heart and the hearts of your children, SO that you may love him with all of heart and with all your soul, and live. Deut 30:6

Thursday, June 14, 2018

8 years


It was a big duplex house - we had the downstairs.

Through the glass doors, that let in all of the heat, (or all of the cold) was the sunroom. It became my office - my classroom. Through that door, and to the left, was my desk. Covered with papers and books and highlighters, there was just enough room for my laptop and a mug of coffee.

In the fall of 2010, I logged on to the school’s website and started to finish my undergrad. During the winter, hunched over the heater, listening to a lecture, I would sit out in that room and dream of my career to come. During the summer, sweating without an A/C, I would write research papers mostly concerning children that I hoped I would have the chance to work with. 

We moved from that house. Then I finished undergrad and started grad school. Then we moved again. Then we became I. I took a break from classes. Then I went back at it. And then, a couple of evenings ago I got an email:


 I knew it was coming. May 19th was a while ago. But still.

Almost 8 years after I went back to finish my undergrad, and almost 6 years after I started grad school, I’ve finished.

And it feels really good. It took way too long - a ridiculous amount of time. But, also just long enough.

I think back to the person I was in 2010 and I am glad that it took me so long. I wouldn’t have had much of a chance of being a good counselor if I hadn’t lived through both the difficulties and joys of those 8 years. So, I can only be grateful.

And excited for what’s next. 

Head down, heart up, hands out. Here we go!

Saturday, June 2, 2018

Bark Mulch


I’m sitting at Starbucks. I was given a gift card and I’m enjoying an Italian roast. Just outside the window of the chair that I’m sitting in is a flower bed. In that flower bed is mulch – bark mulch.

I started thinking about the owner of the bark mulch place, and how excited he was to receive word that the St. Petersburg Starbucks wanted his mulch for all of their stores. And maybe when he got into the bark mulch business all of his friends and family thought that he was ridiculous. But, he stuck to his dream of having the best barkmulch in the bay area, and here he is, just seven short years later – the barkmulch king of St. Petersburg, Tampa, and maybe all of Florida. “That risotto you’re eating?” he says to his children, “That risotto is barkmulchrisotto.” And even though it’s a lemon spinach risotto, and not barkmulchrisotto, they understand that everything they have in life is due to their dad’s persistence that barkmulch was profitable. And it’s true.

And I so often forget that life isn’t about mulch, barkmulch or any other variety, but life is always about the mulch.

Wednesday, May 23, 2018

#SeeYouWhenISeeYou


I’m looking at my hotel room’s wall.

When you get the kind of deal that I did, the walls are usually devoid of art. These ones are. And an artless wall is just fine with me, because I’m 2 kilometers from the airport, and in less than 12 hours I’ll be flying out of Thailand – no time for hotel art.

 When I bought these tickets back in June of last year I added on 6 days at the end of my internship. The thought was that maybe I would want to travel a bit before leaving the country. Also, there was a chance I would be leaving Thailand and not planning a return trip.

I was wrong on both accounts. Oh well, this is why my fortune-telling gig right after college never took off. When last Friday came around I was ready to be home –where I will have a hard time breathing with Bernadette, Belle, and Phil’s fur clogging up my sinuses. And, I am planning on returning to Thailand…

You know those people who always say, “It changed my life!” in regards to everything (including my famous green beans (which are good, but not that good))? I’m going to borrow a line from them.

This time changed my life.

Being in Thailand was so good. Being at Cornerstone, with some of the best people ever, has been incredible. Counseling, nearly full-time, is difficult - and I love it. Working with cross-cultural workers in a counseling environment is emotionally draining – in the best way possible. But, most of all, counseling children? I have come alive.

I don’t know, this might sound pompous, naïve, or misguided, but I feel deep in my bones, that God wired me to be a counselor. And even deeper, I believe life has happened how it’s happened to equip me to sit with children. So, I can’t wait to get back to it.

If I had imagined my best life for myself, I couldn’t have imagined as fulfilling of a life as the one I believe I am entering into. I had dreams. Oh, I had dreams! But, they weren’t this good. And sometimes, I had no dreams at all - other than to survive the workday, the workweek, and the worklife. But in all of those, I couldn’t have imagined this.

So, thank you. Seriously. Thank you. If you’re reading this that means that in some way you were a part of all of it. So, to nearly everyone in my world: I’ll see you when I see you, and hopefully I see you soon.

Friday, April 13, 2018

Hazelnuts and Fat People

I was going to wait to show you this until I got this framed, but I'm too excited.



My friend, Erika, asked if I would like a painting done. And, immediately I knew what I wanted. Not only did Erika do an awesome job with the painting, she did an incredible job of taking my 3 separate ideas and combining them into one thought and painting. 

Here they are: 

Two Giant Fat People
God and I
have become like
two giant fat people
living on a tiny boat.

We keep bumping
into each other
and laughing  
                                         - Hafiz


The Seed Cracked Open
It used to be
that when I would wake in the morning
I could with confidence say, 
"What am 'I' going to do?"

That was before the seed
Cracked open

Now Hafiz is certain:

There are two of us housed
In this body,

Doing the shopping together in the market and 
tickling each other 
while fixing the evening's food.

Now when I awake
All the internal instruments play the same music.

"God, what love-mischief can 'We' do
for the world today?" 
                                                 - Hafiz


The Hazelnut
And in this he showed me a little thing, the quantity of a hazelnut, lying in the palm of my hand, as it seemed.And it was as round as any ball. I looked upon it with the eye of my understanding, and thought, 'What may this be?'
And it was answered generally thus, 'It is all that is made.' I marveled how it might last, for I thought it might suddenly have fallen to nothing for littleness. And I was answered in my understanding: It lasts and ever shall, for God loves it. And so have all things their beginning by the love of God.
In this little thing I saw three properties.
The first is that God made it.
The second that God loves it.
And the third, that God keeps it.
                                                                   - Julian of Norwich

So, in response to what I am learning of, about, with God, or what is on my heart, I would go ahead and show you this painting. 










Friday, April 6, 2018

Those Grand Glories


Those Grand Glories
Yes, of course I want them

Those Grand Glories

Admiration
Adulation
Affirmation

Or were you referring to the other
lesser known glories

Friend’s laughter
patio sitting
a simple, quiet life

Those would do too



I’m more and more convinced that there is no such thing as the right way to live a life. Sure, there are wrong ways, and there are better ways, and some dogmatically inclined folks might say that there is God’s way. But, I just can’t be sure that there is one perfect way.

Maybe I am saying this because I am at a crossroads. And maybe I’m trying to pad the possible fall – limit the potential damage – soften the proverbial blow that would smack me in the face.

Or maybe, after all this time, I'm actually getting there.




Sunday, February 4, 2018

The North Face 100 - Thailand


5 Kilometers in - I was breathing hard, getting hot, and already behind where I wanted to be.

Ryan, Richard, and I had gotten to the Khao Yai area on Thursday afternoon after flying to Bangkok and driving the rental car 2 hours north. Thursday passed quietly, Friday did the same until we found our way to the race area to check-in, pick up our bibs, and listen to the race instructions.

Running is unique in that it’s the skinny people who are scarier. And there were a lot of skinny-scary dudes walking around. I was getting pretty intimidated, and Richard ‘helped’ calm my nerves by telling me, “Looks can be deceiving… you don’t look fast.” True enough.

I didn’t know what place I was in, but after only 30 minutes of a 100k race, that’s not very important. What’s more important, for me at least, is to follow my plan. So, I put my head down, sped up, and after several more kilometers was back where I wanted to be.

I don’t know how many miles Richard, Ryan, and I have run together since I got to Thailand, but it has to be several hundred. That being said, it was great to spend the weekend with them. They both ran races this weekend as well.

The miles started ticking off and I was feeling good. I caught up with a fellow runner at some point in here and we made conversation for a while. That turned out to be Kristian Morgan, the guy who ended up finishing 2nd and was never far behind the rest of the day. These early miles - with the steep climbs, the sharp downhills, and everything else - these are the ones that you cherish, as the later miles don’t just tick off.

Running on the road I turn a sharp corner and am greeted by a line of young school children. In unison they wai (bowing with hands clasped as in prayer) and yell, “Sa-Wa-Dee-Kha!” “Hello!” I think I managed a translatable grunt back at them as I waved, but their smiling faces buoyed me for miles. Another time a young boy ran with me for 100 meters or so while he tried to get a selfie of him and I. Joy.

Several hours in I ran into a wall. It was a wall of folks running the 15 and 25km race. This wouldn’t have been a problem but it was climbing up a steep hill and then descending that same hill with no room on either side. I spent 10 minutes saying “Excuse me!” waiting for people to step aside, and then rushing to the next group of people. I had to do this with probably close to 100 people. The only thing that kept me from going crazy was knowing that everyone else in my race was in the same situation.

In one of these packs of people I passed the 1st place 100k runner.  So, coming out of that section I found myself in first. And, as the new first place runner, I got a motorcycle companion that followed me around and pointed me through the rest of the course. I’d like to think that we became friends, but a lot of things from Saturday are fuzzy so that might have been in my head.

I took several minutes to enjoy being in the lead, but I could feel the footsteps of Quang Tran (the 3rd place finisher) close behind. So, I put my head down and ran.

What do you think about when you run that far?” I thought about my mom who I knew would be up until I finished (2:45am her time), so I ran as fast as I could so she could cheer and get to bed. I thought about cheesy lava pizza, finish line massages, and why on earth I run these races. But mostly, I was just trying to enjoy the day. Waving to kids, Thumbs-upping fellow runners (“Suu Suu!!!”), and trying to remember poems, (“Forget your voice, sing! Forget your feet, dance! Forget your life, live! Forget yourself and be!” - Kamand Kojouri).

It got hot. It got hard. It got to the point where I didn’t want to take another step. But I did.

As I’m sitting here thinking of all of the stories, all of the people, and all of those little moments that pass quicker than they come, I am forced to stop writing soon or I’ll go on and on. 

I spent nearly 40 miles in the lead. I felt like I was being hunted, and it was not a great feeling. I’ve always enjoyed laying back and waiting for opportunities, but Saturday, for several reasons, I felt like my best strategy was to push early and hang on. Finishing only 2 minutes ahead of second place, 10 minutes ahead of 3rd place and only 35 minutes ahead of the first woman I think that was a good idea!

“Why (or how) do you run that far?” It used to be that I would run angry. Or, if not angry, sad. Life can sometimes be difficult. And I firmly believe what I have said about running being a chance to get a win in life. Running doesn’t solve a failing relationship, but it can displace some of the pain for a little while.  But, right now? Finishing up 2017 and having a good start on 2018? I can be nothing but grateful for my life. And so, when the race got hard, like they always do, this time I didn’t whip myself. This time I didn’t force myself to not quit like I had in other life endeavors. Instead, I ran happy, free, and with joy. And that made all the difference.

Saturday was a great race, but now I am excited to just run for fun for a while. I’m leading a “Couch to 5K” program for my friends at work, and that is great.

I got a free entry into The North Face’s 100k in Hong Kong next December, so maybe I won’t retire just yet. Maybe one more year of this… ; )