Spanish Lessons

I’m kicking myself. News alert: I’m not so bright. Why wasn’t I spending my free time, back home, with my nose in a Spanish book? There is obviously no substitution for immersion, which I think I’m getting in spades, but still. Voy – Va – Vamos – Fui – Fue – Ire… You know, those things that I should know by heart.

Scene: 3 kids and one 1 guero (means white guy), sitting at a table, eating lunch. The guero looks happy but confused. He thinks one of the children just called another one a name, but he’s not sure. The guero decides to become involved in the conversation and divert the negative energy.

            Guero: Como es tu escuela?

            Nice kid: Como fue la escuela.

            Other kids: *laughing

            Guero: Que?

Nice Kid: Como fue la escuela.   

Guero: Oh! Si! Como fue la escuela?! *Guero looks pleased with himself

            Nice kid: Bien.

            Guero: *thumbs up. Mucho Gustas.

Welcome to my life. Here’s the good thing. I’m refusing to be afraid of failing. At this point in my life, failing with flair is my best attribute. So, 14 days in and I can already see improvement in my Spanish. I’m not bragging about it because I just got done crying about it.

I’m just saying.

So I’m a little stuck. I want to interact meaningfully with the kids. Instead, I feel like I’m watching the party from the outside. Sometimes I try to crash the party (“Hey! Whatcha doing!?”), but all I have are my dance skills, and everything I know I learned from Napoleon Dynamite.

But, I’m trying to remind myself, love has so little to do with words. That’s the trap that I get caught in often times. I want to speak love, because it’s the easy way. And now, I’ve painted myself into a corner where I am nearly unable to speak love. So I need to find a way to show and communicate love without words.  This is a good thing. A challenging, but healthy thing. And I remember, this is probably one of the most important things I need to learn. To love. I’ll close with a fragment of a poem by Christopher Poindexter:

“I know my purpose here on this frightened planet is to make people feel loved, and when I become too proud and tired for that, give my bones to the vultures.”